Remembrance

On Sunday, September 27, 1981 I called my close high school friend , “Janie” (not her real name) to check in with her. I had not spoken with her in a couple of weeks. I had graduated high school three months earlier and while I was happy to be out of high school, I did miss seeing the friends I had left behind. They were seniors now, their last year before exiting school and entering the next phase of their lives. So, it was her uncle who, after I asked to speak with her, wanted to know who I was and what I wanted. I told him who I was and explained I was a friend of hers from school. What he said next really stunned me, paralyzed me actually. He told me she died the night before, a car accident, and the date the funeral would be held.

For the first year following her death I could not get over it. Whenever a song or group that we liked came on the radio I felt the pain physically in my gut. I always remembered her birthday and the date of her death two days later as the years went by. Eventually, she faded to the background as I started a career, entered and exited relationships, got married and started a family. It was while I was driving to work one morning in the early 2000’s, after both of my children were on the school bus, that I received a message from her. The reason she chose that moment was mysterious but effective.

Shortly after that I would begin writing what I could recall from our brief school years together. At first it was just a few memories, the obvious ones like the favorite band that brought us together. Then the little things like passing notes in school, boys, what she wore, her hair. The more I started to write down the details the more I recalled. Then the tears came and the heartbreak all over again. I could not believe some of the little and big things, nuances, her sense of humor and other memories that I had forgotten or suppressed over the years.

I turned it into a short story in 2014. ‘Sweet Dreams’ was inspired by our friendship and my own spiritual journey up to that point.

I still feel her around me sometimes. I have wondered how she would have reacted to the grunge movement in the early 1990’s that ushered in Alternative rock. She may have said it’s all rock and roll. I wondered if she would be a drummer in a band as she always dreamed of and what she would think about other women rockers. In 1981 there was Debbie Harry, Joan Jett and the Go-Go’s. Would she have been among them one day?

What I know for sure is that there is a reason for everything. The answers are not always offered up. Maybe it’s just meant to be a mystery. Whatever the reason, she is still in my heart and always will be.

SHYLA

From my journal entry on November 8, 2017:

‘For no apparent reason last night (11/7/17) I thought of Shyla and prayed for her.

I found a post on FB from yesterday (also 11/7/17) that she passed away. I’m so sad, but so happy that I knew her.’

Shyla was a very important spiritual teacher and mentor for me. She was an intuitive and medium and had those abilities since she was a child. She had been giving readings and teaching other spiritual practices for many years. She practiced Wiccan and was a Reiki Master. And Shyla was always generous with her time and her gifts.

 I had seen her about six months before her passing for my last reading with her. She was showing me how to interpret a tarot card. I had worked with my own tarot cards, looked at the pictures and read the interpretation in the accompanying booklet. She taught me to look at everything on the card, that there were objects and scenery – symbols – that were specific to the message. The card that she was explaining that day featured a man (King?) on a throne with Ram symbols all over the card indicating that a love interest would be an Aries – also based on the placement of the other tarot cards in the reading. There was an Aries man that I was interested in at the time too.

Over the twenty five years that I knew Shyla, I learned something new every time I saw her about tarot, psychic development, the spirit world, different realms, Reiki (I learned Reiki because of her. I am Reiki 2nd Degree), and extra terrestrials. I had called her one evening a few years ago before my son was to come back from a Boy Scout camping and hiking trip in New Mexico. I explained to Shyla about my sons ‘dreams’ about extra terrestrials. He had a couple of them where he would wake up terrified. He had had an ET ‘dream’ four days before he was scheduled to fly out with the boy scouts for this once in a lifetime trip. ET’s and New Mexico: if the trip was not already paid for I may have tried to cancel it. I was on the phone with Shyla for an hour talking about what this meant and more information than I wanted to know about extra terrestrials. I knew they were not dreams, per se.

I had met Shyla in the early 1990’s when nearly everyone in my office went to see different psychics, first Judy and then Shyla. I would continue to see Shyla once a year or twice since then, wherever she was. She moved a lot trying to find the space she was meant to be in. As a Medium, Shyla told me that although she did see and hear spirits, there was one time in a haunted house with a paranormal group where she did not want to open her eyes to see the spirit of a woman who was in a bedroom. That surprised me about her.

So today when I did automatic writing, asking for guidance from the angels, I also called in my Grandma Shirley for help, Shyla made herself known. I was not thinking of her however she offered some advice and had a message for me. When I was done I looked at my notes and thought it was odd that Shyla came to me without me asking her for help. Perhaps I needed a teacher. This time of the year is also when the veil is thinnest and our loved ones can come to us and we can hear or see them better.

A Visitation

“Sweet Dreams”, 2019 Lettra Press

‘Janie called me on the phone. “Rockin’ Rosie Mahoney!” “Janie! Where are you?” I cried. ‘

Our loved ones appear to us in our dreams. Loved ones calling us on the phone or talking to us through a radio in our dreams. These are visitation dreams. Our loved ones just want us to know that they around us and that they are okay. Sometimes they just want to check in and say ‘Hey’ and sometimes they have a message to give us.

Very often our crossed over loved ones choose to reach out to us while we are sleeping. And that is because they do not want to frighten us. They do see us during our waking hours and many young people can see still see spirits of loved ones even if they transformed to the spirit world before they were born. I can feel their presence and I know they are around  me. But how can they communicate with us? Birds, feathers, coins, suddenly hearing a word or phrase or a song on the radio in answer to a question: “Show me a sign that you’re around me. “

Six months after my high school best friend died suddenly, I received a message from her in a dream. She called me on the telephone to tell me that she was safe and alright. As a teenager, I did not know what happened to us when we died. Do we die and that’s the end? Or do our souls/spirits continue on to another life? What I learned from that dream was that she had crossed over and was communicating to me through a medium that I would understand. After school, we would talk for hours on the phone about everything and nothing. (A 1980’s landline telephone; cell phones were not created yet.)

I believe that all dreams are messages and a visitation from a crossed over friend, relative or co-worker is a special message that they are safe and watching over us.

Channeling

Several years ago a friend invited me to a group meditation at the house of a friend of hers. The group meditation was to be followed by a channeling session. Meditation is not my forte because I usually fall asleep or recite a mental to-do list. I really wanted to be there to see what channeling was; I had heard of it before and I was intrigued, but I did not know what to expect.

Before the evening began and introductions were made, I expressed this to the woman facilitating the group meditation and channeling that night. In fact, the only channeling I had ever seen was in the movie, “Out on a Limb”, based on Shirley MacLaine’s book and starring her and the actual channel (depicted in the book as Kevin Ryerson). Watching that in the movie was riveting to me. So I wondered if this woman channeling would be just as interesting.

During the group meditation about fifteen people sat in chairs or on throw pillows scattered on the floor. Soft meditation music played, a single candle lit and the guided meditation begins. I cannot tell you what thoughts came to me. All I recall are the lights. My eyes were completely closed and I could see bright white flashes of light and then blue/green/magenta flashes of light. I knew that there was a single candle but it was not that bright. These flashing lights were dancing in the center of the room. I knew they were spirits, angels even. And I knew if I opened my eyes the lights would no longer be there. Keeping my eyes closed I enjoyed the light show. There was a lot of energy in the small living room. Angels, archangels, spirit guides and crossed over loved ones of everyone there that beautiful spring night.

After a break, the channeling began. I sat next to her but before she began she explained to me what would happen. And then the room became quiet until all of a sudden her body started moving, as if she was dancing in her armchair. A voice came through. It was her voice but with a slight, playful accent. The entity she channeled was known as ‘One’. ‘One’ greeted everyone, gave a short message and then opened it up to the participants for questions and guidance of a spiritual nature, generally. No one asked for the winning lottery numbers.

When it was my turn, I asked ‘One’ about the weight I was carrying around my waist and abdominal area, my solar plexus. No matter how much exercise I did the weight seemed to stay where it was. The answer I received was this. The weight is related to not being getting enough out of life. I was not getting out enough possibly because of some things happening in my private life. ‘One’ made a pulling motion from the channeler’s midsection to show pulling things out of the abdominal area to demonstrate what it meant. I understood. The solar plexus, the power chakra, is the body’s energy center for assertiveness, self-esteem and will power. I was grateful ‘One’ did not mention a serious health issue.

I just want to say another thing about channeling. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are all conduits or channels of universal energy. I call it being in the ‘zone’ when I feel like I am on autopilot. And if you’re in the zone and you get a series of numbers, play them.

When the Student is ready, the Teacher appears


I was reading a self help book when I met my first spiritual teacher. The book, purchased from a bookstore was something I thought I needed in my life at the time. After reading less than half of the book I realized that it did not resonate with me. It was not what I was looking for after all. My sister had invited me over to meet him; she would be meeting her boyfriend there as well. The book I was reading was in my hands when I was introduced to him, although I can not recall why I would be carrying it around with me. But the Universe did.

After introductions, he asked me what I was reading. Prenaturally, he must have known why I was reading it and asked me to follow him inside. From a book shelf he chose a paperback and handed it to me and said I should read it. It had helped him. The book was ‘Out on A Limb’ by Shirley MacLaine. “When the Student is ready the Teacher will appear”, he said. I had never heard the Buddhist saying before but when he said it I got goosebumps. Something inside of me pinged. It was a knowing.

I was a little skeptical about this book having recalled what I had heard of it and her at the time. Less than 10 years from the time it was published I had her book in my hands and read the books description on the back cover. I waited about a week before I actually read it, unsure if I was really ready to read it. It changed the trajectory of my life. My spiritual journey had begun.

Just like different phases of schooling we go through in life, so did my spiritual journey. When I had completed the book, I read another my new friend had shared with me. This one was ‘There is a River’ by Edgar Cayce. My life was transforming and I wanted to learn more about New Age spirituality as it was called. When I was ready, the next teacher on my journey appeared. And then the next. And then the next. And I am still learning.



A Past Life

20181215_084458.jpgDuring a past life regression therapy session I saw myself in at least a few lifetimes. There were men in each of those lifetimes: a dark haired man with a mustache who was a landlord of a rundown building; a farm hand of my family’s farm and property in the 1800’s; a man in a white tee shirt and a red plaid kilt who was my father in that lifetime.
Past life regression therapy is therapy. To get to the root of my issue in this lifetime, I had to go back through as many lifetimes as it took to find where the karma began. My higher self and spirit guides, guided me and protected me during this soul journey back in time where I saw, not the entire lifetime with the aforementioned individuals ( it’s only a 2 hour session), but scenes from those lives showing me and reminding my subconscious of a situation in that lifetime, kind of like a movie trailer. In spiritual truth, I did not forget. The memory was there all along in my cells. During and after those scenes I knew who the man was in all of those lifetimes and certain traits of those men were familiar to me in this life.
I was raped by the farm hand in the 1800’s and became pregnant. In another scene from that life I saw myself on a horse drawn wagon with my parents – unknown to me in this life – being sent away until the baby was born. The farm hand in that lifetime was my husband in this life. In this lifetime I learned that the karma with my husband was to give him children.
The man with the red kilt, who was my father in that lifetime, was also my husband in this life. I was about twelve and was enslaved, meaning I performed nearly every chore there was to be done and I did not want to do it anymore. I wanted my own life. I wrapped a red plaid shawl around me and began to walk away. He ran after me with a spear and plunged it into my chest and twisted it around. The wound was fatal. During the therapy session the practitioner asked me where my soul was leaving my body. I lifted my hand to put it on my chest a couple of inches above my sternum.
I felt myself floating toward the sky and turned myself around and saw my body lying there on the ground. It did not hurt. I was not scared. I turned back around and saw the blue tunnel and went through it to the ‘Other Side’. And it was beautiful there. My guides and angels were with me throughout this transition. When I got home that night, I washed up before bed and my eyes saw the red stained birthmark on my chest. I had seen it my whole life and never knew what it was or how it got there.
Having read quite a few books about reincarnation and past lives, this was my first experience with my own past life memory. Not only was it therapeutic, but it was absolute proof for me that our souls do go on after this life.

Divine Mission

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photo courtesy A.K. Brill

 

 

Her mission was to restore the French Monarchy. She cut her hair short and dressed in men’s clothes as an act of rebellion. As a young woman she could not pull off this mission unless she presented herself as a man. St. Catherine and Archangel Michael presented themselves to her at 17. They told her she would rescue the Dauphin, Charles VII, the king of France who was in English custody after England invaded France. She was a warrior in the French army triumphantly leading the charge at the battle of Orléans. January 6 marks the 606th anniversaire of Jeanne D’Arc, Saint Joan of Arc.
January 6 is also the Twelfth Day of Christmas and the Feast of the Epiphany, when the three kings or wise men arrived to see the baby Jesus. So during Joan of Arc’s journey, she was aware that she was born on the Epiphany – an epiphany she did not take lightly. She believed there was great significance in this shared date and a definite connection with Jesus. They were both leaders and both were captured and eventually put to death – for a mission that they believed was divinely guided. However, Jesus died to save mankind’s sins. Joan died because of her perceived sins: hearing voices of the Archangel Michael and St. Catherine, believing in what she was born to do, dressing as a man to rescue and restore France’s king to his place on the throne and refusing to give in to the Catholic church’s demands.
She was handed over to the English, branded a heretic, cruelly treated in a medieval prison and finally burned alive at the stake – which was prophesied by the voices that had led her the two years since beginning her divine mission. Only her pure heart remained unburned.
Everyday our angels, the archangels, the saints and God (the Creator, the Universe, Source, or whatever God is to you) speak to us. They are answering our prayers or giving us clues to what is next for us on our path or what our purpose is. Are we listening? Or are we waiting for an epiphany?

 

 

Astrology

20170701_211602.jpgI suppose my jumping off point into metaphysics was astrology. As an adolescent I was intrigued and completely fascinated with horoscopes and made a point to commit to memory all the signs and their characteristics, as well as their constellations.  I see a lot of astrology mentions this time of year, not surprisingly, as we are coming upon the season of prognosticators who will be predicting what may be happening in 2018. Let’s hope that it is a better year all around.

“What’s your sign?” was the classic pick up line a few decades ago. When I was learning to be a radio broadcaster,  a fellow classmate asked me if I was  a Gemini, not because of my chosen communications profession (Gemini’s ruling planet Mercury rules communication), rather she said that I was energetic and impulsive. She assumed that I was a Gemini.  She was very surprised that I was not a Gemini and insisted that I must be, the description of the Twins fit me.

However, she wasn’t  entirely wrong. Many years later during my self-education of numerology I discovered that my life path is in fact Gemini. I have learned that our life path zodiac signs are almost as influential as the zodiac sign we were born into.

Although I don’t claim to be a numerologist, or an astrologist, I did learn about numerology from the Astrologist Linda Goodman whose books ‘Star Signs’ and ‘Love Signs’ were very popular. (Her books are still sold in book stores). She says  the name we are given at birth – the letters in our name correspond to a numerical alphabet; the day in the month that we are born,  and our birth date added up as a mathematical equation. All of these numbers and our astrological sign combined represent who we are. So, are we just a group  of numbers?

For example: the day of the month that I was born is 12. 1+2=3. The number 3 corresponds to the sign of  Sagittarius. A Fire sign.

The numbers of the name I was given at birth add up to 33. 3+3=6. According to Linda Goodman the number 6 is the number assigned to the signs Libra and Taurus because they have the same ruling planet, Venus.  So, Air and /or Earth.

Next my life path numbers add up to 23. 2+3=5. The number 5 corresponds to Gemini,, an Air sign.  Gemini represents communication, movement, and intellect.

It was Edgar Cayce who said that we chose the astrological sign that we wanted to be born into for certain lessons and experiences that we wanted to have here on planet Earth.  Everything is planned meticulously: our name, date and time of birth, as well as who we choose to help us on this journey and where our experiences will take place, et cetera.

Apparently,  I chose to be born into the zodiac sign of Capricorn.

 

 

 

Wishes Can Come True

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”
~ Walt Disney

 

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*photo by Leslie Sheridan

 

Keep moving forward. I first heard these words spoken in the Disney animated movie, ‘Meet the Robinson’s’ 10 years ago. I now know that these words were prophetic for me. A year and a half later a major life change happened. Alas, I did not remember these three words at the time. It might have helped me a little if I did. Change is constantly happening but I’ve been feeling it with such intensity these last few years. And so, I’m reminded of those three words rather frequently now. They’ve become my mantra.
Keep moving forward. Logically, what other choice do we have? I guess we could stay where we are but nothing new or better would come of it. Although it’s easy to get into a rut, getting out of it might be something like struggling to get out of quicksand. My point is if we choose to dwell on being sad, negative or fearful, three guesses where we’re going to end up – right where we are.
However, if we accentuate the positive or day dream about what we want our future to be, that is, use our magical powers of manifestation, we are moving forward.
This time of the year, as we get closer to Halloween and Samhain (SOW-in, the Celtic New Year) the veil is thinnest. Which means our dreams and wishes can manifest quicker. If we stand still we might miss an opportunity. Let’s keep moving forward towards positive change, towards our dreams despite the fear or worry; let the forward motion get momentum.
It’s the Law of Attraction. What we think about, talk about and do is what we are manifesting right now. What we set our minds to whether it is a career, relationship, a new house or anything we desire will come to us. (If you need a visual to help you get started – vision boards are great!)
Walt Disney was the master of change and positivity. He believed in magic. He believed in his dreams. Let’s all make some of our own magic and keep moving forward towards our dreams.  

Hey, Jealousy

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One of my first visits to a psychic about 25 years ago revealed a past life situation. She told me that I had difficulties making friends with women because in another life – she didn’t say which one – a young woman that I knew then (and was in my current life at the time of the reading) was jealous of me because she liked my brother – in that life – and she wanted to be with him. So, she cursed me that I would never again make lasting friends. I wish that I had known then to ask the psychic for more details. It sounded bizarre and hard to believe, but I was having difficulties with a former roommate around that time. Could she be the young woman this psychic was referring to?
Curiosity got the better of me. Different scenarios played out in my head. My first guess was that this young woman – in that former lifetime – practiced witchcraft. Or this went back centuries before the religious persecutions in the medieval era when, before Christianity forced many people to give up their religious beliefs, all kinds of pagan ceremonies and rituals were the norm. Or perhaps it was after this time, where she clandestinely performed a type of ritual to keep me friendless for all eternity. It really did sound like a story straight from the Merlin era.

 
In the event that medieval curses are not real, jealousy, a fear -based emotion, is the act of being resentful of a rival or being envious, and acting hostile over someone else – is defined as a curse.
I am not a jealous person although my humble beginnings may have given me many good reasons to be envious or covetous of others’ lives. I grew up poor, had hand me down clothes and I did not think myself a pretty girl. I had wavy hair when all the other girls had straight hair; my teeth weren’t straight. I couldn’t do all the things or go to the places that the other kids did or went. Occasionally, I did when it was affordable to do so. I never finished college; I never dated the cute boy in school; never went to the prom.
Why would anyone be jealous of me? It’s okay if you don’t like me. I can live with that.
Jealousy is debilitating to friendships and relationships. It comes from a feeling of being insecure and being envious of someone else’s accomplishments and advantages, because they have something you want. And, it’s poisonous to the body. Yes, jealousy is toxic. And not just for the friendship or relationship, but for the sender’s body. Jealousy is a low vibrational energy. It’s dense energy that can be felt in many places in the body including the heart and solar plexus.
Planet Earth is hard enough to live on sometimes, so let’s be compassionate to one another – let’s open up our hearts! Also, wish lists and positive affirmations are great for manifesting what it is we do want. It works!